Edge Of Attack's Jurekk says The End is My Insanity
Edge Of Attack came together in 2008, was an active band playing shows, writing and recording material that would lead to two LP's "Edge Of Attack" (2013) and "Fiend Of Possession" (2016). Later having the band split up due to typical band reasoning's. But looks on the horizon see the band possibly getting back together in the coming future. For now though, Jurekk James guitarist/vocalist goes into detail about his time with Edge Of Attack, and how some of the material off their releases dealt with mental illness and how he is here to help those who suffer just as he does.
1. You mentioned of suffering from a mental illness, would you like to disclose what mental illness?
I suffer from anxiety and depression. It's always been present in my music, lyrical-wise as well. It's more presented in "My Insanity", like that is my song.
2. How do "My Insanity" and "The End" involve your mental illness?
"My Insanity", the song was written in a weird temp and the intro was also in a weird way. More or less though, the idea of the song was for me to write a song, that was super weird. But it was still catchy as well. I always have to have that hook, to hook you in ya know? I can't go and write a song without a BIG hook! The idea of the song and its lyrics, it's about the struggle with anxiety and depression. Like I think the song opens up with the lyrics that read "What do you do when all hope is gone". That says it all right there alone.
Now "The End" was written in a phase of my life at the time of where I was with someone, for the longest time. I wrote that song about us, because we were coming to an end. It is just life and how it works, it just doesn't work out, like a never ending cycle type of thing.
I have nothing against Roxanne, whom I was with for 4 years. She just didn't have the ethic to want to go and work, let alone finish the album. The album being "Fiend Of Possession", doesn't even have her on it, because she was hating me at that time, she never finished it. She's only present on some of the material off that album.
3. Can you go into further detail about how "My Insanity" revolves around your mental illness?
"My Insanity" was written from a person dealing with panic disorder and depression. If you listen to the lyrics, it is more about always being on edge. It is like if you are going to get ready and someone is watching you. This song being a favorite for me off this album. The guest vocalist we had really nailing the vocals but anyway! This song is just for those people who deal with anxiety that is all it is. It's like to those who have that paranoia anxiety feeling of always being watched or followed ya know? It's hard to live with, but after a while you can deal with it. But it is also hard to accept it too. This song was written at a time I was not so sure, on who I was.
4. What about "The End", what can you explain about how this track involves your mental state of being.
"The End" was written like I said, it is in the same texture on purpose because there is that feeling of tension when you listen to the song. Lyrically the song was written for those who know of something or someone and being able to let go. Just let go of what you have known of that time, place, person or whatever it may be and just accept and be who you are as a person.
5. Why was it just these tracks off "Fiend Of Possession" that reflected your mental illness so much so?
If you ever listen to my lyrics, under my namesake, they always involve or revolve around my mental illnesses. Those two songs came out as being the one's because they were able to allow me to be expressive of myself. Which I don't really do often or before actually. Usually when I write lyrics I do it differently and these songs I just poured my heart into them so to speak.
6. What do you have to say to those who also suffer from mental illnesses?
Push through. Like when you get through high school, there is that sense thinking that all the problems will go away type of feeling but it is not like that. You get those same problems if not a new set of problems you will always be dealing with. It is okay, being who you are is who you are. Just be you, push yourself to your own goals and everything will be fine and work out.
7. How would you say you cope your everyday life with this mental illness?
For me, coping was really hard. When I was with other acts, it was really hard. I didn't know who I was or where I was really. By the time I had written these tracks we discussed I had grown a lot. In terms of how I deal, I take each day at a time, set goals for myself and accomplish them one by one. You just have to push through it's all you can really do.
8. Would you want to give any advice or recommendations in regards to mental illness and what people should do if they are suffering or in your position?
I've been on medication for a while, they never really helped. The biggest thing for me, was being able to talk to someone, no matter who it was. If I had someone to talk too about my issues for 5 minutes if not more than that like 1-2 hours, then that would work for me. Being able to just talk about your issues and being able to express what you're dealing with is all you need really. It was for me, it's helped me a lot, so if you are someone that is not one to talk to others. Try your best to bring yourself out of your comfort zone as best as possible and just talk it out. It will help you out and go a long ways. The thing most people don't understand with these issues is the pressure we have and being able to get it off your chest. It just goes a long way ya know? I talk to my own sister and she is my rock just having someone to talk too everyday will do the trick. There is a tip too just talk.
9. What about to those who feel they are a bother to those around them and don't know what to say when needing to talk it out?
You are not bothering them. You would be surprised who would show up. Your family or friends will always be there and want to talk with you. You just need to be the one to speak up. Just be honest about how you feel, they are always willing to listen.
10. Anything else you want to say or get out there?
Nope I feel we covered it all!
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